FIRST SLAMMED DOOR

Hermana Schomburg sent this photo while
she was at the Chile CCM.
It's the way missionaries prefer to find doors.

Okay, so here in the mission, usually people dont want to talk to you. So, you knock their door and try to talk AS FAST AS POSSIBLE SO THAT YOU CAN SAY ALL THE WORDS BEFORE THEY CLOSE THE DOOR and usually theyre polite-ish and just very slowly close the door like you arent going to notice if they do it slowly

but

we had a REAL SLAMMED DOOR THIS WEEK

we knocked the door

and it opened

and there was a little old lady inside and she was like 'QUE QUIERES' [WHAT DO YOU WANT] and i was like 'hola soy hermana schomburg soy misionera de la iglesia de jesucristo-' 'PERO QUE QUIERES' 'queremos hablar de dios y jesucristo-!' [Hello, I am Sister Schomburg and I am a missionary of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and IF YOU WANT TO we would like to talk to you about God and Jesus Christ.] AND THEN SHE SLAMMED THE DOOR SO HARD IT LIKE SHOOK THE WHOLE WORLD. 

But so... that happened. 

Love the mission so much though, really :) also we had lunch with a menos activa [less active] and her son started cleaning things with a soapy sponge and a bowl of soapy water and he was cleaning the fridge

and decided the sponge wasnt big enough

and dunked his head in the bowl

and started cleaning the fridge with his face and hair

it was quite entertaining

the last time he made some juice with a WHOLE LOT OF AJÍ [chili peppers] in it and was VERY disappointed when we didnt want to try it

Also, fun fact, chileans LOVE PRESIDENTE KENNEDY

not sure why

but they all just love him

ALSO WE WERE IN A LESSON THIS WEEK AND THE INVESTIGATOR ASKED ME TO START TALKING IN ENGLISH AND IT WAS SO HARD AND THEN IN THE END

SHE ASKED ME TO PRAY IN ENGLISH

AND 

I 

ALMOST

COULDNT

LITERALLY HOW DO YOU USE THEE AND THOU AND THY

I DONT REMEMBER

I LITERALLY WAS HAVING TO TRANSLATE FROM SPANISH TO ENGLISH I NEVER IMAGINED THAT THIS WOULD START TO HAPPEN TO ME

I NEVER IMAGINED

THAT I WOULD START

TO LOSE

MY

ENGLISH

THIS IS PROBABLY THE SCARIEST THING THAT HAS HAPPENED IN ALL MY MISSION FORGET ABOUT THE GYPSIES AND THE EARTHQUAKES AND THE THOUSANDS OF DOGS THAT WANT TO EAT YOU

I AM FORGETTING ENGLISH

I NO LONGER FLUENTLY SPEAK ANY LANGUAGE

HELLO DARKNESS MY OLD FRIEND

Also Hna Alonso is learning english and we try to talk in english when we make calls and stuff and she just is so funny, I cannot even tell you guys. She is the actual best. She was thanking Elder Adcock for something the other day and told him 'I VOTED FOR YOU' and also here in Chile we say 'a donde' sometimes which basically is like a response to when people exaggerate like 'i have forty million dollars' 'a DONDE' or like 'i am the best driver' 'A DONDE' stuff like that but literally translated to english it doesnt make sense, but so, our district leader said something and hermana alonso just said, 'WHERE' in english in the 'a donde' tone and it was SO FUNNY CANT EVEN TELL YOU

but anyway

sorry this email has been a bit lame and not very informative

please send questions so that i am not lame and un-informative the next time haha LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH

CCCCCCCCCCCIIIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[In defense of Hermana Schomburg's un-informativeness, she did not receive an email from home before she wrote, so she was a bit worried about her momma. All is well however, and I'm sure she will be much more informative next week. haha]